Day Seven

The hummingbirds flitter to and fro happily collecting their food. I often wonder if they have problem pre-teenagers. Probably not, because all they do is fly to get nectar and food and then go about their busy day. They instinctively know what to do and how to do it and there is no attitude at all. Lucky hummingbird mothers.

Not like me. My children have stubbornness borne into them; it is part of their DNA. Let me explain. My son had a basketball game on Friday night; I dropped him off and went to find a parking space. When I finally go to the gym he was nowhere to be found, but there was plenty of time so I wasn’t worried. Then it was time for the game to start. At first I wasn’t going to look for him, I thought to myself that he is old enough to know when the game will start. But then I thought about it and went looking for him. He was outside playing basketball with one of his friends. I did get mad because he should have been already in the gym with his uniform on.

He went to the gym looked for his coach and was told where to find his uniform. Well to make a long story short, the uniforms didn’t come in and all that was in the room were some XXL shirts. My son wears a size small adult, actually an extra-small adult. So needless to say he wouldn’t wear one and he was upset and he wouldn’t play. Times like this I honestly wish I knew what to say, but I don’t, so I yelled at him. We sat for a while watching the game, me thinking that he would get over this and decide to play, but he didn’t. So before the game ended I decided to leave because as long as he wasn’t going to play it wasn’t worth staying and watching the game. On the way home I didn’t say anything, but of course he pouted and said that he wasn’t going to play basketball. Again I didn’t argue with him, because I knew it wouldn’t do any good. The next morning I did speak a little to him saying that he needed to start acting a little more grown up, that if the guys saw him crying or pouting he would be picked on. That I can’t be around all the time and that when people say things to him, he is going to have to learn to protect himself. I told my husband that I don’t know what to do with him, because he is stubborn. I can’t bribe him to do something, which is not right. The whole point is that he loves to play basketball and even though he is the smallest on the team, he still enjoys it. So where did this stubbornness come from? We know it is from us, it is always the parents.